Features

Bachelorette and Bachelorette

By Features Staff

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Natalie Adams '17: 

Hometown: Pittsburgh, PA.

Home on Campus: Milbank 13.

Major: Comparative Literature (not Gov, contrary to popular belief).

Turn on? Can name all of the current female senators.

Turn off? Thinks the electoral college is good for America.

If you were a dorm which would you be and why? The Co-op, because I’m structured and organized during the week but that goes out the window on the weekends.

If you had to describe yourself as the love child of any two musicians, whom would you pick and why? Bruce Springsteen and Lana Del Rey—am I Born to Run or Born to Die?

What advertising slogan best describes your life? Beef. It’s what’s for dinner.

What TV genre best describes you? Feminist period piece.

What’s the best pick-up line you’ve ever used/had used on you? “Are you religious? ‘Cause you’re the answer to all my prayers.”

What’s your type? NJBs.

What are three things you cannot live without? Brunch, Politico Playbook, and the Oxford Comma (sadly the Spec does not agree with the last one). 

If you were any social space, what would it be? Right outside of Sadove waiting for the late night jitney.

Where do you go when you want to be alone? Lol I wish, can’t get rid of my suitemates.

If you could join one group on campus, what would it be? I’m already overcommitted.

What’s your patronus and why? A penguin, because I think I can fly but end up falling flat on my face.

If you could break one rule at Hamilton and get away with it, which would you choose? Darty on the roof of Milbank.

What would you give a thumbs up? The Pittsburgh Penguins.

What would you give a thumbs down? Teams that choke in the playoffs (the Washington Capitals).

Who would you say is your campus crush? Benjamin Joseph Goldman.

Who would you say is your faculty crush? Margo Okazawa-Rey.

What is the weirdest thing currently in your room? A very lifelike Hillary Clinton mask #StillWithHer.

Liz Lvov '17:

Hometown: Albany, NY.

Home on Campus: Babs.

Major: Comparative Literature.

Turn On? Love at first sight.

Turn Off? Follow up questions that men ask to assert their own relevance to something not pertaining to them at all. 

If you were a dorm which would you be and why? Mo-ho because I’m also deeply haunted.

What advertising slogan best describes your life? I reject this question on the basis of not condoning capitalism.

If you had to describe yourself as the love child of any two musicians, whom would you pick and why? 80s Russian pop star Alla Pugacheva and nobody else. She is my mom. Listen to “Aisberg” if you haven’t already. 

What TV genre best describes you? “Escapist divorcee fantasy.” Examples include Under the Tuscan Sun or Eat Pray Love.

What’s your type? Hot and righteous.

What’s the best pick-up line you’ve ever used/had used on you? Personally I’ve never so much as flirted, so I don’t have an answer to this question.

If you were any social space, what would it be? A bonfire forest hang where nobody gets lost and everybody is warm.

If you could join one group on campus, what would it be? Four in five women who haven’t been assaulted.

What’s your patronus and why? A big fickle cat. 

If you could remake the points system, what would be the number one offense? I would have it be limited to trivial shit like stealing wet floor signs and not have sexual assault of any type be considered as something that can be assigned an empty numerical value.

What are three things you cannot live without? Twitter, Instagram and Snapchat. Add me @Lizlvov.

What’s the weirdest thing currently in your room? A gorgeous red velvet chair shaped like a hand. Honestly such a statement piece; it really holds the room together.

Who would you say is your campus crush? The reflection of myself that I catch a fleeting glimpse of when I walk past the diner doors.

What would you give a thumbs up? Femmes!

What would you give a thumbs down? Men! Ladies, HMU.

If you were a food, which would you be and why? I’m already a snack.

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